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Author Topic: Have a general life question  (Read 1227 times)

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RazorbackAlways

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Have a general life question
« on: September 05, 2016, 03:49:18 pm »

What forum can I post it in? Don't see a forum for it even in the Non-Sports area. Mod, please feel free to move this wherever it goes. Thanks.
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Wayne Watson

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #1 on: September 05, 2016, 04:02:05 pm »

What forum can I post it in? Don't see a forum for it even in the Non-Sports area. Mod, please feel free to move this wherever it goes. Thanks.

First, thanks for looking for a place.  Since we don't have a general conversation forum, fire away right here.
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ricepig

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #2 on: September 05, 2016, 04:03:07 pm »

First, thanks for looking for a place.  Since we don't have a general conversation forum, fire away right here.


Well, I was going to suggest the Tavern, but this will work.....
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Wayne Watson

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #3 on: September 05, 2016, 04:04:27 pm »

Well, I was going to suggest the Tavern, but this will work.....

You know how those clowns are.  He'd never get an honest response.

Let's hear the question, then deal with it.  Make sense?
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RazorbackAlways

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #4 on: September 05, 2016, 04:19:29 pm »

Thanks Mod. Alright, so there's been a topic that's been sort of bothering me for a while. It's kind of like, I know the answer as in, I know what I would tell someone else if they told me the same thing, but I myself have become confused. I think 99/100 people probably deal with this. There's a person I know who has been very successful in everything they do in their lives. And by success, I mean, they did well in school, got their dream partner, and now in the working world, they've been moving up the corporate ladder really quick. They're pretty young, and they're making a pretty good chunk of change and are living a well established lifestyle with kids. When I went to their home recently, they told me they were moving into a new place soon. I guess out of curiosity I checked around to see what's up, and I was almost stunned at the price. I thought how the heck? At this age? How could they be getting this many breaks? It's almost impossible. Now, this person has some level of embellishment, but numbers and facts don't lie when searching for prices. My point is, that no matter how hard I work, I don't think I'll ever get the breaks they're getting. In hindsight, I could've done a lot of things they did, go to the same schools, start work at the same places, and never in a million years do I even relatively think that I would have anything resembling of the same. It's kind of like, it's too easy for them. I know there's no simple answer to this question. But I can no longer help but wonder how in the world they could be getting all that? People I know worked for years and years to achieve what they have, but don't even have close to the type of life these guys are living. There's people I know how have relatively the same qualifications, but aren't reaching the same level of success. I don't want to sound like a hater, but I do know these people are somewhat materialistic and showy. I know that I might have the wrong attitude (maybe sound envious) about this, but I'm just trying to understand how? How could it be this simple for some, and not for everyone else? Man, after reading what I just wrote, I almost feel like I need to see somebody. Anyways, hoping to hear what people think.
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rhames

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #5 on: September 05, 2016, 04:21:39 pm »

Uhhh what
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RazorbackAlways

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #6 on: September 05, 2016, 04:23:40 pm »

Uhhh what

Sorry man. But I didn't want to post that in the Sports Forum. Which is why I asked.
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BPsTheMan

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #7 on: September 05, 2016, 04:25:26 pm »

They're probably from old money

Who cares? Live your life and stop comparing yourself to others
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rhames

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #8 on: September 05, 2016, 04:27:31 pm »

Sorry man. But I didn't want to post that in the Sports Forum. Which is why I asked.


I would just say some people will always have more than you but the majority of the world will have less.


It's easy to say don't focus on what others have but we are all guilty of it. Just continue to work hard and be happy with what you have.


You really don't know their financial situation. Are they saving? Investing? Living beyond their means??


In the end, that doesn't really matter
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BPsTheMan

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #9 on: September 05, 2016, 04:29:01 pm »


I would just say some people will always have more than you but the majority of the world will have less.


It's easy to say don't focus on what others have but we are all guilty of it. Just continue to work hard and be happy with what you have.


You really don't know their financial situation. Are they saving? Investing? Living beyond their means??


very possible

OP, if they're not from "old money" they could be up to their eyeballs in debt, and hide it well

you don't want that
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Poppa Tart

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #10 on: September 05, 2016, 04:31:08 pm »

Thanks Mod. Alright, so there's been a topic that's been sort of bothering me for a while. It's kind of like, I know the answer as in, I know what I would tell someone else if they told me the same thing, but I myself have become confused. I think 99/100 people probably deal with this. There's a person I know who has been very successful in everything they do in their lives. And by success, I mean, they did well in school, got their dream partner, and now in the working world, they've been moving up the corporate ladder really quick. They're pretty young, and they're making a pretty good chunk of change and are living a well established lifestyle with kids. When I went to their home recently, they told me they were moving into a new place soon. I guess out of curiosity I checked around to see what's up, and I was almost stunned at the price. I thought how the heck? At this age? How could they be getting this many breaks? It's almost impossible. Now, this person has some level of embellishment, but numbers and facts don't lie when searching for prices. My point is, that no matter how hard I work, I don't think I'll ever get the breaks they're getting. In hindsight, I could've done a lot of things they did, go to the same schools, start work at the same places, and never in a million years do I even relatively think that I would have anything resembling of the same. It's kind of like, it's too easy for them. I know there's no simple answer to this question. But I can no longer help but wonder how in the world they could be getting all that? People I know worked for years and years to achieve what they have, but don't even have close to the type of life these guys are living. There's people I know how have relatively the same qualifications, but aren't reaching the same level of success. I don't want to sound like a hater, but I do know these people are somewhat materialistic and showy. I know that I might have the wrong attitude (maybe sound envious) about this, but I'm just trying to understand how? How could it be this simple for some, and not for everyone else? Man, after reading what I just wrote, I almost feel like I need to see somebody. Anyways, hoping to hear what people think.
There's your main problem. If you don't believe it can happen, then it's damn near impossible for it too. That's not to say that simply believing is going to get you there. The fact is that some people have more ability in certain areas than others. The key, IMHO, is to find which area(s) you excel in, then pick and build your career based on that. Finally, never judge your own success based on the success of others. There are many, many different measures of success, and material is only one. Good luck.
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Wayne Watson

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #11 on: September 05, 2016, 04:32:02 pm »

Thanks Mod. Alright, so there's been a topic that's been sort of bothering me for a while. It's kind of like, I know the answer as in, I know what I would tell someone else if they told me the same thing, but I myself have become confused. I think 99/100 people probably deal with this. There's a person I know who has been very successful in everything they do in their lives. And by success, I mean, they did well in school, got their dream partner, and now in the working world, they've been moving up the corporate ladder really quick. They're pretty young, and they're making a pretty good chunk of change and are living a well established lifestyle with kids. When I went to their home recently, they told me they were moving into a new place soon. I guess out of curiosity I checked around to see what's up, and I was almost stunned at the price. I thought how the heck? At this age? How could they be getting this many breaks? It's almost impossible. Now, this person has some level of embellishment, but numbers and facts don't lie when searching for prices. My point is, that no matter how hard I work, I don't think I'll ever get the breaks they're getting. In hindsight, I could've done a lot of things they did, go to the same schools, start work at the same places, and never in a million years do I even relatively think that I would have anything resembling of the same. It's kind of like, it's too easy for them. I know there's no simple answer to this question. But I can no longer help but wonder how in the world they could be getting all that? People I know worked for years and years to achieve what they have, but don't even have close to the type of life these guys are living. There's people I know how have relatively the same qualifications, but aren't reaching the same level of success. I don't want to sound like a hater, but I do know these people are somewhat materialistic and showy. I know that I might have the wrong attitude (maybe sound envious) about this, but I'm just trying to understand how? How could it be this simple for some, and not for everyone else? Man, after reading what I just wrote, I almost feel like I need to see somebody. Anyways, hoping to hear what people think.

It's called having good credit.  Connie and I live in a modest 1600 sq. ft. house with a pool and 3 dogs.  We could have a much larger house but why?  It's just the two of us.  Some (a lot) of people think they have to live to the maximum of their means.  I don't.  I'd rather pay myself every month and invest, hopefully, wisely.  I want to have something when I retire and to be able to leave my kids and grandkids something after I am gone.  Lord knows they will need it.
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PonderinHog

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #12 on: September 05, 2016, 04:32:48 pm »

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Wayne Watson

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #13 on: September 05, 2016, 04:34:33 pm »

There's your main problem. If you don't believe it can happen, then it's damn near impossible for it too. That's not to say that simply believing is going to get you there. The fact is that some people have more ability in certain areas than others. The key, IMHO, is to find which area(s) you excel in, then pick and build your career based on that. Finally, never judge your own success based on the success of others. There are many, many different measures of success, and material is only one. Good luck.

Solid advice if I ever saw it.  Thanks for your input, Poppa!
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The Chief

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #14 on: September 05, 2016, 04:38:03 pm »

For 90% of the people you describe who don't come from "old money," the answer is simple:  Debt.

The other 10% saved their money, never borrowed, self-insured, paid for their home with about 50% down, then paid it off faster than a 15 year mortgage while enjoying the interest rate of a 15 year mortgage.  They then bank their high income into investments and living life and giving.

If you are in dire financial straits, I would encourage you to find Dave Ramsey's book, "The Total Money Makeover," and give it a read.  It's more than just a book on how to gain wealth, but how to philosophically look at money from a moral perspective.  You can find some of his stuff on Youtube, as well.

Bottom line, their is no magic money.  You pay for things up front, or you pay even more for it later.
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RazorbackAlways

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #15 on: September 05, 2016, 04:41:45 pm »

Yeah, it's possible that they could rack up some debt. But they're doing pretty well in Corporate America. So it's hard for me to imagine that. Just the promotions and things they've gotten, and how quickly they've happened. I guess everything put together made me question how.  I guess I just felt like I know people who are putting in a lot of work, but not really reaping the kind of rewards comparatively. It could all just be an image, and not necessarily the full picture.

But you guys are right. I gotta live my life and not worry about them. Yeah, I think I'm not good at ladder climbing. I feel like there's too much control by people above you. I absolutely hate corporate politics. If you're not in, you're basically out. I need to find out what I'm good at. Lots of good answers on here by the way. Thanks for contributing.
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Wayne Watson

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #16 on: September 05, 2016, 04:46:26 pm »

Yeah, it's possible that they could rack up some debt. But they're doing pretty well in Corporate America. So it's hard for me to imagine that. Just the promotions and things they've gotten, and how quickly they've happened. I guess everything put together made me question how.  I guess I just felt like I know people who are putting in a lot of work, but not really reaping the kind of rewards comparatively. It could all just be an image, and not necessarily the full picture.

But you guys are right. I gotta live my life and not worry about them. Yeah, I think I'm not good at ladder climbing. I feel like there's too much control by people above you. I absolutely hate corporate politics. If you're not in, you're basically out. I need to find out what I'm good at. Lots of good answers on here by the way. Thanks for contributing.

What is your age?  If I may ask.
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RazorbackAlways

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #17 on: September 05, 2016, 04:49:29 pm »

I'm in my early mid-thirties.

Gotta keep this as vague as possible so no one I know gathers anything from this. Haha.
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HiggiePiggy

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #18 on: September 05, 2016, 04:53:18 pm »

Is this person talkative?  What I mean is do they talk a lot with upper management.  Sometimes people that are silent and do not ask for promotions will sometimes get overlooked even if they are about the same as the one that talks and gets promotions.

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RazorbackAlways

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #19 on: September 05, 2016, 04:58:09 pm »

Is this person talkative?  What I mean is do they talk a lot with upper management.  Sometimes people that are silent and do not ask for promotions will sometimes get overlooked even if they are about the same as the one that talks and gets promotions.

I wouldn't call them super talkative. But I would say that this person will ask for a promotion if they feel they deserve one. The way they put it to me once was that they felt they weren't being paid enough, and so they raised heck about it. They told their superior that they had all the qualifications required, and got their promotion. But they had already been promoted several times before, and quite quickly. They are very competitive for sure. And from what I gather, they have been able to get the good graces of upper management based on the conversations we've had. Kind of like one of the golden children.
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sevenof400

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #20 on: September 05, 2016, 04:58:51 pm »

The mind is racing with possibilities the OP could have evoked in the Tavern. 

Shame on you Wayne!
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Wayne Watson

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #21 on: September 05, 2016, 05:07:51 pm »

The mind is racing with possibilities the OP could have evoked in the Tavern. 

Shame on you Wayne!

I can too.  That's why I didn't want it there.  Everything in life is not a joke.
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sevenof400

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #22 on: September 05, 2016, 05:07:59 pm »

RazorbackAlways,

In a rare (for me) attempt to be serious for a moment, consider the following:
  • There will always be someone who moves up the corporate ladder or gets breaks in life faster.  Always.
  • You can quickly eat yourself up with anger and resentment if you let the situation fester and effect (affect?) you.  Don't do that.
  • Focus on your situation and your goals.  What are you doing to achieve what you want.
  • If living in a spartan and thrifty manner is your cup of tea, then drink heavily from it.  Your revenge will come from being financially independent and having options other people will never have who spend money like drunken sailors on shore leave. At an early future age, you may have choices they would kill for - such as the independence to not work when they still have to - if that is a goal of yours.
  • You asked why it is simple for some?  The answer is they are living for the moment - and when the check comes due, they will be in a world of excrement.  Smile at them as you glance upon them from afar.
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sevenof400

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #23 on: September 05, 2016, 05:08:27 pm »

I can too.  That's why I didn't want it there.  Everything in life is not a joke.

You are a wise one, Wayne!
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ricepig

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #24 on: September 05, 2016, 05:09:00 pm »

Debt, inheritance, lottery, just damn good at their job.....there's too many variables to know the "why". As was said earlier, concern yourself with things you can control, and not worry about your friends. Do like I do, be a good friend and hope they invite you to travel on their jet for vacations, ballgames, etc.....
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sickboy

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #25 on: September 05, 2016, 05:10:14 pm »

I'm in my early mid-thirties.

Gotta keep this as vague as possible so no one I know gathers anything from this. Haha.

We're the same age. I came from Little Rock, but was probably considered poor. One parent home with a mother who was a teacher. You do the math. I took out loans to pay for private college. Did well for myself in my career because I was fortunate here or there and own a modest home in Los Angeles, which probably skews on the very expensive side in Little Rock. And my wife and I are having kids and were looking at moving to Bel Air/Westwood/Brentwood...

Then -- I slowly started feeling less fulfilled by stuff I had acquired and more fulfilled by the the little things. We started getting rid of stuff we didn't need. Instead of buying things -- we got in the car and drove to new places together. We stopped looking into moving to the nicer neighborhood and started looking at moving to Utah or Arkansas, where we could live more simply. In other words -- the grass started to get greener on the other side.

My point is -- you can envy your pal who has everything now. But I can guarantee you that once you have "everything" -- you won't be fulfilled. And you'll either consume yourself with wanting more -- or realize your priorities should be elsewhere.

Honestly -- all I need in life is my wife, my friends, my dogs, a tv to watch Arkansas football/basketball... and a few good books. And I didn't learn that until I spent my twenties gunning for the "idea" in my head which I thought was the benchmark for success.
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sevenof400

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #26 on: September 05, 2016, 05:14:10 pm »

You mentioned this:

But you guys are right. I gotta live my life and not worry about them. Yeah, I think I'm not good at ladder climbing. I feel like there's too much control by people above you. I absolutely hate corporate politics. If you're not in, you're basically out. I need to find out what I'm good at. Lots of good answers on here by the way. Thanks for contributing.

If your skill set is in demand, and you are not comfortable where you are (employment wise), consider your options elsewhere.  Corporate ladders can become poisoned and if that is the case, you do not want to invest time climbing a rotten ladder. 

Are your skills useful to other companies in your vocation? 
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sevenof400

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #27 on: September 05, 2016, 05:17:19 pm »

I can too.  That's why I didn't want it there.  Everything in life is not a joke.

...although based on his OP, I thought it was going to be a life insurance question....
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Poppa Tart

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #28 on: September 05, 2016, 05:20:50 pm »

Solid advice if I ever saw it.  Thanks for your input, Poppa!
I appreciate that. Same to you, brother.
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Wayne Watson

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #29 on: September 05, 2016, 05:24:08 pm »

I will say this and I'll only say it one time.  I thank the Lord a minimum of 3 times a day for what He has provided.  That is not say you should.  I won't pass judgement.  But I know the minute, I let the Lord back into my life, it went from bad to good.

If you can lay your head on the pillow at night knowing you gave your employer the best you had that day, you can rest easy.

Everything in your life is about you.  It is not about the guy next door.
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SDZ_Hog

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #30 on: September 05, 2016, 05:54:31 pm »

My wife is fighting cancer that should have been diagnosed early and only needed out patient surgery. However, before we could find competent doctors it had metastasised. Now she has developed an allergic reaction to the Chemo that was working.  Now the Dr are running out of answers. Meanwhile,  we've taken on a lot of debt.

 Not looking for sympathy.  Just things could always be worse and don't take a Drs word for it if you know somethings wrong. We went to two Drs before the third one found it.  That dr was stunned of the  the other dr's  lack of new patient  examination procedures when my wife explained the symptoms as she met with them for the first time.
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golf2day

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #31 on: September 05, 2016, 06:11:19 pm »

Have you looked at the difference between wholesale and street level coke prices?

Seriously though, I feel you. My wife and I decided she would stay home with our kids 9 yrs ago, so we are on one income. I have a great job and we live in a great neighborhood, but there are some things that our friends do that we just can't swing.

There's always gonna be somebody with more. When you run into one of them and their job doesn't equal how they live it's either family money, debt, or they've done the math on wholesale vs street prices. Don't be jealous!
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sevenof400

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #32 on: September 05, 2016, 06:31:38 pm »

Seriously though, I feel you. My wife and I decided she would stay home with our kids 9 yrs ago, so we are on one income. I have a great job and we live in a great neighborhood, but there are some things that our friends do that we just can't swing.

But you sir have made the most important investment of all (your children) and in the short and long run, they will be better off.

I salute you, Golf2Day!
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golf2day

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #33 on: September 05, 2016, 07:00:00 pm »

But you sir have made the most important investment of all (your children) and in the short and long run, they will be better off.

I salute you, Golf2Day!
Oh, I agree 100%. Wouldn't trade it for anything. Was just trying to commiserate a bit.

Thanks for saying that!
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RazorbackAlways

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #34 on: September 08, 2016, 09:20:33 pm »

You mentioned this:

If your skill set is in demand, and you are not comfortable where you are (employment wise), consider your options elsewhere.  Corporate ladders can become poisoned and if that is the case, you do not want to invest time climbing a rotten ladder. 

Are your skills useful to other companies in your vocation?

Yes, I think they are definitely transferable. But I'm in a sort of crisis in which I'm not certain whether I want to do what I'm doing for the rest of my career. I think as someone mentioned above, I need to figure what I'm good at, what I want, and then try to build on that.

By the way, thanks for all the responses. This turned out to be an interesting discussion.
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kodiakisland

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #35 on: September 09, 2016, 04:42:36 am »

Your life will be a lot better once you stop worrying about what others may have.  The grass is always greener is an oxymoron, not a truth.

Live your life to the fullest.  Love yourself and your family with everything you have.  Stop watching others.  Be happy with who you are and what you have.  Material wealth means nothing in the end.  Lots of wealthy miserable bastards out there.  Don't try to be one.

When I say my prayers, I pray my children will have happy families of their own one day.  I don't pray for their success as that will take care of itself if they are happy.
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DeltaBoy

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #36 on: December 06, 2016, 08:52:04 am »

Sometimes no matter how careful you are the breaks of life go against you.  My Brother in law can look at a Cow paddy and make money off it. 
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golf2day

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #37 on: December 06, 2016, 04:32:28 pm »

Sometimes no matter how careful you are the breaks of life go against you.  My Brother in law can look at a Cow paddy and make money off it.
What kind of startup costs am I looking at going into the cow patty arbitrage biz?
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ricepig

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #38 on: December 06, 2016, 04:59:14 pm »

What kind of startup costs am I looking at going into the cow patty arbitrage biz?

Well, you are either going to have to get a cow, or access to where he's been.
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golf2day

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #39 on: December 06, 2016, 06:13:50 pm »

Well, you are either going to have to get a cow, or access to where he's been.
There's gotta be more to it than that
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sevenof400

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #40 on: December 06, 2016, 10:31:07 pm »

There's gotta be more to it than that


Wouldn't you need the cow to make patties?       ;D
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husker71

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #41 on: January 04, 2017, 07:22:51 pm »

I am seriously thinking of selling a investment property I inherited ($250000 value or so) and move to somewhere warm and fairly cheap.  I already get my SS  so if the taxes would not be so bad (I am not sure what they would be)  since I am only 63.    Just thankful for what I have    by the way if any of you have any idea what my tax bill would be I would appreciate any help 
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golf2day

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #42 on: January 05, 2017, 02:12:56 pm »

I am seriously thinking of selling a investment property I inherited ($250000 value or so) and move to somewhere warm and fairly cheap.  I already get my SS  so if the taxes would not be so bad (I am not sure what they would be)  since I am only 63.    Just thankful for what I have    by the way if any of you have any idea what my tax bill would be I would appreciate any help
You may qualify for what's known as a stepped up basis on the property. What that means is that the only taxable part of the sale is whatever it sells for over and above the value on the date of the previous owners death.

It's a big enough deal that you should talk to somebody professional about it before you sell. You may not owe a dime in taxes.
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ricepig

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Re: Have a general life question
« Reply #43 on: January 05, 2017, 02:34:19 pm »

You may qualify for what's known as a stepped up basis on the property. What that means is that the only taxable part of the sale is whatever it sells for over and above the value on the date of the previous owners death.

It's a big enough deal that you should talk to somebody professional about it before you sell. You may not owe a dime in taxes.

That is correct, and usually is the case on inherited property.
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