Seems like a good time

[PonderinHog]

I planned for this, Ponderin'. We'll just have OTR pull the dung cart with his Radio Flyer. He can also clean up for your horses. Can't have horses darning up a nice bandwagon trail.

Where'd he runnoft to?  First mention of work and he's gone.

[Boardon Hamsay]

Where'd he runnoft to?  First mention of work and he's gone.

Hopefully he's getting a garden trowel, a shovel of some sort, or some rubber gloves.

[PonderinHog]

Hopefully he's getting a garden trowel, a shovel of some sort, or some rubber gloves.

What do you think about this Mulberry Squeezins feller?  Think we can get any work out of him?

[Boardon Hamsay]

Scarlett's, you nailed it.

Whenever I've always thought about medieval prisoner transfer, it made me think "OTR"

having him pulling up the rear will not only save the rest of us from the smell, but also hold out a proverbial carrot for OTR to see in front of him, a metaphor for how he could one day better himself and be on the real bandwagon with the regular people

not that we would ever go through with actually allowing him on the real bandwagon, because we won't. But it still gives him a goal to shoot for.

Indeed, Rex, indeed. Our collaborative efforts have yielded a plan for maximum Hog bandwagon comfort while also encouraging human betterment through a medieval inspired, inclusionary teased reward system that ultimately alienates those still lacking in worthiness.

[Boardon Hamsay]

What do you think about this Mulberry Squeezins feller?  Think we can get any work out of him?

We can bring him in for a Hog bandwagon interview.

[Mick Hogger]

You've got to admire one thing. No matter how hard you try, Guv never breaks character.

[Overtheroadtruckdriver]

Looks like there is plenty of room on the charlie strong Bandwagon.  Why don't you boys go jump on that one.  We can drop you off in dallas friday.

[Boardon Hamsay]

Looks like there is plenty of room on the charlie strong Bandwagon.  Why don't you boys go jump on that one.  We can drop you off in dallas friday.

Reported to Darrell Royal's Floating Flaming Fulminating Spectral Head.

[Mike_e]

Reported to Darrell Royal's Floating Flaming Fulminating Spectral Head.

Oh crap, you know he's just going to set the thing on fire, right?

We could ask PWJ if one of his hairy overly large footed friends could just steal his lugnuts.

[BPsTheMan]

Folks, I believe I have an answer for all the confusion we've been experiencing the past few weeks as the Hogs have gone 3-1 and are now being mentioned as being on the crux of joining the Top 25.

What we are experiencing is a lack of faith. If that has all the makings of overtheroadtruckdriver starring in a Dan Brown movie, then so be it. If that means "admitting" that Will Gragg did in fact make his commitment to the Hogs because of the Bandwagon thread, then my apologies to OTR for doubting him during this past week.

Now, is that truly a heartfelt apology to OTR? No. It's not. It's window dressing. We all know it was J. Holly Blassingame's gout that hauled in Will Gragg, but you know what, it doesn't matter. OTR needs a reason to feel good about himself, so we need to all get on board with proclaiming that The Bandwagon brought Will Gragg to the Hill.

Even if it's not true.

Folks, now we can all move on toward A&M, in Jerry World, hoping that fat kid will be there, and have his shirt off twirling it around in the bleachers. GUV can move on with his biased love affair with Jeff Long, and Robert Shields can truly relax and begin outlines on the literary work we've mentioned before, The War Memorial Pressbox Bathroom Society.

So where does this leave OTR and Houston Nutt?

Simple exchange of destiny, that's where. The more I thought deeply last night about 13th century prisoner transportation, the more I realized who belongs in the caboose of the bandwagon. Houston Nutt does. Chained up and dragged from behind the bandwagon, rolling along in the little medieval contraption with wooden wheels that aren't aligned correctly, bumping up and down on the dirt road and shaking Houston into a constant state of sleep depravation, as he begs peasants for bread and water while the bandwagon passes through random villages.

And who/what needs to be directly in front of Houston, at the back of the bandwagon? Emory Bellard's Flaming Green Burrito Mist. Blackening out the fresh air the rest of us will enjoy, as the Green Burrito Mist of Emory Bellard fills the nostrils of Houston Dale.

Then, with medieval justice still thirsty for an extra pound of flesh, Houston administers to himself what we've all been calling for now since 2007. Fifty or so 13th century lashes of leather strap penance, like the evil priest on DiVinci Code.



I would like to humbly enlist Porkrind Jimmy and the good PTB's to make this happen.

So, OTR, it's with great pleasure that I announce you have now been chosen to take over Midnight Basketball from Houston Nutt. You've made us proud son. And now you can live to serve others with the Midnight Basketball program, getting miscreants like Fort Dweller and Ponderin off the streets at night, away from burning trucks and breaking into pharmacies, and instead giving them something productive to do.

Thank you Bandwagon, and thank you OTR.

[Overtheroadtruckdriver]

I would have refused to read all that at gunpoint.

[BPsTheMan]

I would have refused to read all that at gunpoint.

The Harry Rex Manifesto is a living breathing document

Like, it's actually alive

It cares not if you like it. It's kind of a dick like that

[Overtheroadtruckdriver]

Tell that to Farouk.

[Mulberry Squeezins]

Tell that to Farouk.

When I heard the news about Farouk's  new Razorback Outfit, I was a little skeptical.  He's not the most fashionable guy I've ever seent.  But I gotta say it's pretty sharp.  Even makes him look a little less fat.  Could Hoss make one of those for me?

[pheine78]

I am a CBB believer, but I will admit to having my doubts.  With that said, I think it is too soon for you doubters to flip-flop.  We started last season with three wins and everyone was on board; 9 games later everyone was ready to crucify CBB.  What will you guys do if we go winless in conference again?  I don't think its going to happen, but then again, we are only a year removed from our worst season in forever. If we lose again on Saturday half of you guys will be calling for blood.  I love the recruiting, love the improvement so far, but I am sick of losing in the SEC.  I honestly don't think we win Saturday, but I think we will be competitive.  I predict two conference wins this season and more going forward.  Next year and the year after I expect improvement at the same rate.  If we go through the 2016 season without 10 wins I will join the head-calling-for bandwagon. 

[Overtheroadtruckdriver]

I am a CBB believer, but I will admit to having my doubts.  With that said, I think it is too soon for you doubters to flip-flop.  We started last season with three wins and everyone was on board; 9 games later everyone was ready to crucify CBB.  What will you guys do if we go winless in conference again?  I don't think its going to happen, but then again, we are only a year removed from our worst season in forever. If we lose again on Saturday half of you guys will be calling for blood.  I love the recruiting, love the improvement so far, but I am sick of losing in the SEC.  I honestly don't think we win Saturday, but I think we will be competitive.  I predict two conference wins this season and more going forward.  Next year and the year after I expect improvement at the same rate.  If we go through the 2016 season without 10 wins I will join the head-calling-for bandwagon.

You can join the sourpuss bandwagon with that kind of altitude.

[Overtheroadtruckdriver]

If we don't win I will give myself a one week ban from hogville.  That's how confident I am that we will win this game. 

[Boardon Hamsay]

If we don't win I will give myself a one week ban from hogville.  That's how confident I am that we will win this game. 

For clarification purposes, are you using your historical retirement durations as a baseline for your definition and scaling for "one week"? Just want to make sure, if needed, we translate your self imposed bant into the proper "OTR time".

The OTR time dilation formula (what is claimed vs what is independently observed) = ((Days of Retirement or Self-Imposed Bant Claimed/7.3)*24) + 2 hrs * Pi.

That said, Go Hogs!

[Overtheroadtruckdriver]

Here's what I think.  I will retire for one full week, seven days, if we don't win Saturday.  You won't have OTR to kick around anymore...at least until next week.

Here's what else I think. Several of you doubting Thomas's made Farouk's "dirty dozen" this week with all the negative talk.  That's a place you don't want to be.  If you don't believe me ask Jimmy boarfett. He's been on that list for years, when Farouk was just Odell. 

Here's what else I think.  I think CBB is gonna be sweating up a storm on Saturday in that Texas heat. I think he is going to be hot and irritable and that irritableness is gonna rub off on our players. I think we are going to run it right down their throats and this punk they have for a quarterback, Kenny Coonpaws, (A & M always finds quarterbacks with paws like a mama coon) is gonna get real tired of having to get up off the ground after ever play.

And I also think that Team Blasingame is ready to step up and take on any local jokel aggies fans who want to cause any problems on hogville.  I invite you all to this thread.  Jack Blasingame himself is gonna take care of business, and it's not gonna take him long to do it.

How this thread has stayed up as long as it has is a testament to Mr. Lanny, a great man and a feller who is becoming a historic sports figure in our state...and he is a friend of team blasingame due to his respect for our founder Mr. Jackson Holly blasingame... most of you know him as our lead recruiting analyst but he isn't afraid to mix it up in here neither.

One last thing.  I am gonna give Guv one last chance to come in here and confess his sins and gain absolution.  If he does we may make room for him on the corner of the bandwagon where he can share a seat one of the corner midgets.  If not he can stay home and keep moping around here.

[pondwater jack]

Here's what I think.  I will retire for one full week, seven days, if we don't win Saturday.  You won't have OTR to kick around anymore...at least until next week.

Here's what else I think. Several of you doubting Thomas's made Farouk's "dirty dozen" this week with all the negative talk.  That's a place you don't want to be.  If you don't believe me ask Jimmy boarfett. He's been on that list for years, when Farouk was just Odell. 

Here's what else I think.  I think CBB is gonna be sweating up a storm on Saturday in that Texas heat. I think he is going to be hot and irritable and that irritableness is gonna rub off on our players. I think we are going to run it right down their throats and this punk they have for a quarterback, Kenny Coonpaws, (A & M always finds quarterbacks with paws like a mama coon) is gonna get real tired of having to get up off the ground after ever play.

And I also think that Team Blasingame is ready to step up and take on any local jokel aggies fans who want to cause any problems on hogville.  I invite you all to this thread.  Jack Blasingame himself is gonna take care of business, and it's not gonna take him long to do it.

How this thread has stayed up as long as it has is a testament to Mr. Lanny, a great man and a feller who is becoming a historic sports figure in our state...and he is a friend of team blasingame due to his respect for our founder Mr. Jackson Holly blasingame... most of you know him as our lead recruiting analyst but he isn't afraid to mix it up in here neither.

One last thing.  I am gonna give Guv one last chance to come in here and confess his sins and gain absolution.  If he does we may make room for him on the corner of the bandwagon where he can share a seat one of the corner midgets.  If not he can stay home and keep moping around here.

d@mn right. d@mn right.

[PonderinHog]

Yeah, Conestoga bandwagons are the best.  Yeah, yeah...

[Boardon Hamsay]

Yeah, Conestoga bandwagons are the best.  Yeah, yeah...

I just put a 3" lift kit on my cardinal red 1863 Conestoga Wagon and am trying to find some wooden spinners for it. It'll be bandwagon ready after that.

[BPsTheMan]

authentic 13th century penance would call for a two week ban

this is historically accurate

I'm not sure where the hell OTR is getting his numbers, but I for one will not sit quietly by and say nothing

[BPsTheMan]

Yeah, Conestoga bandwagons are the best.  Yeah, yeah...

you misspelled conestoga

[PonderinHog]

you misspelled conestoga

Yeah, conestoga wagon, yeah...

[BPsTheMan]

Yeah, conestoga wagon, yeah...

reported

[BPsTheMan]

I'd like to also report Florida Georgia Line to moderators

I'd like to beat Florida Georgia Line with a frying pan

sorry if this is off topic

[BPsTheMan]

bump

[Boardon Hamsay]

bump

So, what was the O/U line on OTR's self imposed bantment (in hours)?

[BPsTheMan]

So, what was the O/U line on OTR's self imposed bantment (in hours)?

point five

[Boardon Hamsay]

point five

Sounds about right. I believe that makes LobsterDog our OTR self imposed bant timeline pool winner!

[BPsTheMan]

Sounds about right. I believe that makes LobsterDog our OTR self imposed bant timeline pool winner!

congrats to LD!

[attachment deleted by admin]

[seasonhog]

congrats to LD!

Did OTR open his "Sunshine Pumping Confession Booth "  a little early....

Those that have jump on his truck have hit a snag......

[PonderinHog]

congrats to LD!

Yeah, LobsterDog loves Conestoga wagon wheels, yeah!

[Boardon Hamsay]

congrats to LD!

Also, congrats go out to OTR for winning the inaugural, Hogvillian Most Likely To Appear In A Grainy Convenience Store Security Video Award!  This award has been a long time coming and when parlayed with OTR's Radio Flyer and Manure Cart duty status for the bandwagon, we know Farouk and Hoss have to be proud. Congrats OTR, on that....thing you won and yeah, for keeping a reasonable distance from us with that manure cart at the end of the bandwagon.

[Hoggish1]

Loved the man since day one.  With wins will come crickets from all the HN, BP and GM lovers.

[seasonhog]

Also, congrats go out to OTR for winning the inaugural, Hogvillian Most Likely To Appear In A Grainy Convenience Store Security Video Award!  This award has been a long time coming and when parlayed with OTR's Radio Flyer and Manure Cart duty status for the bandwagon, we know Farouk and Hoss have to be proud. Congrats OTR, on that....thing you won and yeah, for keeping a reasonable distance from us with that manure cart at the end of the bandwagon.

I hear is is hauling manure over the road...............

[seasonhog]

If we don't win I will give myself a one week ban from hogville.  That's how confident I am that we will win this game.

Are you a man of your word......................................?

[Overtheroadtruckdriver]

Are you a man of your word......................................?

Yes.  I will be back saturday even though in my mind we won that game ever where except the scoreboard.