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The buyout smokescreen - AKA the sour grapes thread

Started by The OTR, October 12, 2017, 10:34:27 am

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The OTR

Quote from: island hog on October 12, 2017, 12:49:32 pm
You just can't let it go....

Add another page to Delta's dossier that Long has on him. Hate to see this.

Sourpuss

I suspect Long is monitoring this thread and I'd suggest to all that we, collectively agree to dial the tone down, as gentlemen.

 

Kevin

Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.<br />James 4:7
Reject Every Kind Of Evil 1 Thessalonians 5:22

Redhogs

Quote from: Pancetta on October 12, 2017, 12:38:51 pm
Have any of you went back and looked at the contract?  I just did and It 100% says we have to pay him $11.7 million if we fire him on Jan 2018. The extension is just an addendum to the original. I have no idea what "legal expert" they got to review it but they should fire him. Look for yourselves. Jist go to end and work your way backwards. https://2michy3wy0l30d34041dt1et-wpengine.netdna-ssl.com/football/wp-content/uploads/coach-contracts/bretbielema-ua-employment-contract.pdf
Will I live long enough to see us win again? Will any of us?

Ex-Trumpet

Quote from: Sourpuss on October 12, 2017, 11:59:39 am
It's funny to me that Slick Long who, as recently as yesterday, was being measured for a casket. Now, 24 hours later, we find out that Bielema, who thought he had a solid contract, got a sponge bath from Long, and is now over a "trap door."  He may or may not be keeping a dossier on some on here.  If you are connected to big donors, I'd hold off taking him to task until things die down or you may be finding out what kind of severance package your work place offers. scary.  Glad I've had enough sense to keep my yapper shut.

I guess it's funny to me that you assume that Bielema and his lawyers were unaware of what's actually in his contract.
Do dyslexic, agnostic insomniacs lie awake at night wondering if there really is a dog?

Sourpuss

The cow doesn't remember when she was a calf....

Feralhog

Quote from: Pillowhead Jackson on October 12, 2017, 10:34:27 am
Looks like we've all been fooled by that carnival magician Jeff Long. He's been sitting on a $15 million smokescreen for all these years...now it suddenly and mysteriously leaks out that it may not be $15 million. 

This was a smokescreen's smokescreen. This makes the smokescreen of hiring Les Miles look like pulling a quarter out a 3 year old's ear. 

Expect more smokescreens.  None of us know what he's up to. That much is certain and we prove how little we know every day.

Somehow this sly old boy from up north is going to continue to pull rabbits out of his hat and saw folks in half right before our eyes (I'd like to volunteer a few of you to get sawed in half) and we're going to sit here and like it.

The only guy who could mess this up is CBB himself. If he wins six games and gets a bowl game he may mess up Long's trick.

And the last three football coaches were rabbits out of a hat anyway. Expect continued and prodigious use of smokescreens that will make Fayetteville look like one big fun house. Expect Long to hire someone that has never been mentioned here before. 


Since the arrival of Long, so called insider stuff no longer exists. As for me, I take everything I hear with a grain of salt.  Maybe all that's changing.  Porkitarian and Hoginit are a couple of guys worth paying attention to.  And after reading the OP, I might have to start keepin my eye on ole Puddinhead here.
Seer, Sage, Soothsayer and former coach finder for the Tejas Longhorns.......Feralhog the Magnificent

snoblind

Quote from: Pillowhead Jackson on October 12, 2017, 10:34:27 am
Looks like we've all been fooled by that carnival magician Jeff Long. He's been sitting on a $15 million smokescreen for all these years...now it suddenly and mysteriously leaks out that it may not be $15 million. 

This was a smokescreen's smokescreen. This makes the smokescreen of hiring Les Miles look like pulling a quarter out a 3 year old's ear. 

Expect more smokescreens.  None of us know what he's up to. That much is certain and we prove how little we know every day.

Somehow this sly old boy from up north is going to continue to pull rabbits out of his hat and saw folks in half right before our eyes (I'd like to volunteer a few of you to get sawed in half) and we're going to sit here and like it.

The only guy who could mess this up is CBB himself. If he wins six games and gets a bowl game he may mess up Long's trick.

And the last three football coaches were rabbits out of a hat anyway. Expect continued and prodigious use of smokescreens that will make Fayetteville look like one big fun house. Expect Long to hire someone that has never been mentioned here before. 

Everybody knew the real number except you, Tusked, and DeltaBoy.  And Wally...

The OTR

Here's what I visualize happening at the long household tonight....Jeff sitting there in his slacks, tie loosened, warm sweater on...fireplace with a small fire crackling softly in the background. Laptop hooked up to the printer at his desk...reading glasses on the end of his nose...glass of grey goose on ice sitting neatly on a coaster exactly in the middle of the coaster....paper towel under the coaster just in case.

He goes through MMQB methodically. He's down to the D's and opens the file cabinet and puts all the members he has a dossier on onto his desk.  Old manilla files, much worn, some thick as war and peace, some more like a cheap paperback from the dollar store. 

The D's.  Oh yes, the D's. In Long's mind the D might as well stand for Devil. Some of hogville's most notorious members are D's.  Darrell Royal's head...nice thick file with mostly nonsense but he's on the list and every one of his posts go in a file....Deepshoat....Dr. Starcs....Dwight_K_Shrute...Dluxhog...and the thickest file of all...one that makes war and peace look like a comic book?  Delta....yes poor delta. Long dreads going through the d's.  He knows Delta averages 179 posts per day, mostly one or two word posts.  But he prints them all off...stuffs them into the thick file...and trudges ahead to the E's...easttexashog...erie...ex-trumpet.

It's painstaking work. Long believes in keeping everything on paper rather than snapping screen shots and saving them electronically.  If he ever needs to he can just set fire to the files and they're gone.  Not a bad way to do things.

Please, Delta, for your own sake be careful of what else you write here from this point forward.  Jeff Long is getting more powerful by the minute and you keep popping off about him. I'm trying to paint this picture for you. I hope you will take heed.

Feralhog

Quote from: Pillowhead Jackson on October 12, 2017, 01:19:44 pm
Here's what I visualize happening at the long household tonight....Jeff sitting there in his slacks, tie loosened, warm sweater on...fireplace with a small fire crackling softly in the background. Laptop hooked up to the printer at his desk...reading glasses on the end of his nose...glass of grey goose on ice sitting neatly on a coaster exactly in the middle of the coaster....paper towel under the coaster just in case.

He goes through MMQB methodically. He's down to the D's and opens the file cabinet and puts all the members he has a dossier on onto his desk.  Old manilla files, much worn, some thick as war and peace, some more like a cheap paperback from the dollar store. 

The D's.  Oh yes, the D's. In Long's mind the D might as well stand for Devil. Some of hogville's most notorious members are D's.  Darrell Royal's head...nice thick file with mostly nonsense but he's on the list and every one of his posts go in a file....Deepshoat....Dr. Starcs....Dwight_K_Shrute...Dluxhog...and the thickest file of all...one that makes war and peace look like a comic book?  Delta....yes poor delta. Long dreads going through the d's.  He knows Delta averages 179 posts per day, mostly one or two word posts.  But he prints them all off...stuffs them into the thick file...and trudges ahead to the E's...easttexashog...erie...ex-trumpet.

It's painstaking work. Long believes in keeping everything on paper rather than snapping screen shots and saving them electronically.  If he ever needs to he can just set fire to the files and they're gone.  Not a bad way to do things.

Please, Delta, for your own sake be careful of what else you write here from this point forward.  Jeff Long is getting more powerful by the minute and you keep popping off about him. I'm trying to paint this picture for you. I hope you will take heed.

You know what Puddin?  It's as if you've got a set of high caliber binoculars zoomed on, not just the Long house, but possibly even penetrating straight into the man's soul.  Scary stuff
Seer, Sage, Soothsayer and former coach finder for the Tejas Longhorns.......Feralhog the Magnificent

TheJoeyBucketz

Quote from: Pancetta on October 12, 2017, 12:38:51 pm
Have any of you went back and looked at the contract?  I just did and It 100% says we have to pay him $11.7 million if we fire him on Jan 2018. The extension is just an addendum to the original. I have no idea what "legal expert" they got to review it but they should fire him. Look for yourselves. Jist go to end and work your way backwards. https://2michy3wy0l30d34041dt1et-wpengine.netdna-ssl.com/football/wp-content/uploads/coach-contracts/bretbielema-ua-employment-contract.pdf
Yeah, I did. It doesn't say that at all. It says that table you're looking at is replacing the table in the original contract, but everything else is the same (except for the other modifications that were noted in the new contract). The original contract clearly states that the table you're looking at is only to be used to find the numerator for the buyout formula.

You take the number you were looking at, 11.7M, and divide by the number of months in his contract, which is 96 or 97. That gives you a monthly payout amount. The UA then owes CBB that amount every month through December 2020. If they wait until jan 2018 the total buyout is somewhere around 4.4M.

The numerator for all of 2017 is the 15.4M number. That's why you should either expect a new coach next calendar year (if CBB plays hardball), or a mutual parting of the ways immediately after the season where the buyout is reduced mutually to the 2018 amounts. Long has no real incentive to fire him in November when he can save 1.5M'ish by waiting until January.
Dominic Fletcher following his homerun against Texas Tech in Omaha, "I thought they said this park was big?!"

The OTR

Quote from: Feralhog on October 12, 2017, 01:25:31 pm
You know what Puddin?  It's as if you've got a set of high caliber binoculars zoomed on, not just the Long house, but possibly even penetrating straight into the man's soul.  Scary stuff

Some of us have connections...some of us don't.

But a lot of folks underestimate the man. If you think the buyout number is the only secret he's keeping then you're being foolish. The secrets that just I know about would make most of you tremble, yes tremble, with fear. And I'm not claiming that I know everything.


hogsanity

Quote from: Feralhog on October 12, 2017, 01:25:31 pm
You know what Puddin?  It's as if you've got a set of high caliber binoculars zoomed on, not just the Long house, but possibly even penetrating straight into the man's soul.  Scary stuff

IT was a little too good, perhaps Pillowhead is actually Jeff Long.
People ask me what I do in winter when there is no baseball.  I will tell you what I do. I stare out the window, and I wait for spring.

"Anything goes wrong, anything at all, your fault, my fault, nobodies fault, I'm going to blow your head off."  John Wayne in BIG JAKE

 

Sourpuss

Quote from: Ward on October 12, 2017, 01:34:43 pm
I hate to even broach the topic, but it wouldn't surprise me if Long has reported Deltaboy to the Southern Poverty Law Center
hmmph

Sourpuss

Quote from: hogsanity on October 12, 2017, 01:34:53 pm
IT was a little too good, perhaps Pillowhead is actually Jeff Long.
(eyes wide open) that would explain a lot, do tell hogsanity...

MB Hog

Quote from: Pancetta on October 12, 2017, 12:38:51 pm
Have any of you went back and looked at the contract?  I just did and It 100% says we have to pay him $11.7 million if we fire him on Jan 2018. The extension is just an addendum to the original. I have no idea what "legal expert" they got to review it but they should fire him. Look for yourselves. Jist go to end and work your way backwards. https://2michy3wy0l30d34041dt1et-wpengine.netdna-ssl.com/football/wp-content/uploads/coach-contracts/bretbielema-ua-employment-contract.pdf
I think you are correct.  It's very confusing because the contract gives the buyout amount as the Total Guaranty Payment, but then says the payment schedule for the buyout amount is also based on the number of months in the employment term and the number of months remaining in the term.  The way the DMZ calculated, they divided the $15.4 million (prior to of Jan. 1, 2018) by the total number of months of the contract (97) beginning December 4, 2012 and going through December 31, 2020.  This comes to a monthly total of $158,762.88.  The next step based on the DMZ's understanding, is to multiply that $158,762.88 by the remaining number of months of the contract ending December 2020.  Their next assumption is that if CBB is let go at the end of November 2017, the number of months remaining in the contract is 37.  So they calculated $158.762.88 x 37 months to come up with the $5,874 million buyout total.

However, I believe the actual calculation to come up with the monthly payment is also based on the number of months remaining in the contract.  In the example above, this means the denominator is also 37 rather than 97.  So you then get a monthly payment of $416,216 for the remaining 37 months of the contract period through December 2020, which, of course, comes out to $15.4 million as guaranteed by the contract.  The reason I think this has to be the case is that the numbers don't add up (and are not particularly fair to CBB) if you use the DMZ's logic.  Just look at the final year of the contract.  The buyout is $4 million if CBB were fired in 2020.  So - if UA let him go on January 1st, 2020, if you divide the $4 million buyout by 97, that comes to $41,237 per month.  Multiply that by 12 months remaining in the contract and the total buyout would only be $494,845.36... only a fraction of what the guaranteed buyout says in the contract.  I just don't think there is any way that is correct.  I think the whole numerator / denominator formula is just the method to determine the monthly payout of the guaranteed buyout amount.

That said, the contract does require that if CBB is let go he must "diligently seek and accept other employment," and any money he makes in his new employment offsets what UA would owe him.  So if he gets another job making $200,000 per month, then UA would only pay him $216,000 per month through 2020.  Still a lot, but makes the overall buyout significantly less costly.

ricepig

Quote from: Pillowhead Jackson on October 12, 2017, 01:33:58 pm
Some of us have connections...some of us don't.

But a lot of folks underestimate the man. If you think the buyout number is the only secret he's keeping then you're being foolish. The secrets that just I know about would make most of you tremble, yes tremble, with fear. And I'm not claiming that I know everything.



So, you're saying I'll have to pay for those free sandwiches I got when the CC machine wasn't working in the EIC during the TCU game?

hawgon

Quote from: MB Hog on October 12, 2017, 02:07:15 pm
I think you are correct.  It's very confusing because the contract gives the buyout amount as the Total Guaranty Payment, but then says the payment schedule for the buyout amount is also based on the number of months in the employment term and the number of months remaining in the term.  The way the DMZ calculated, they divided the $15.4 million (prior to of Jan. 1, 2018) by the total number of months of the contract (97) beginning December 4, 2012 and going through December 31, 2020.  This comes to a monthly total of $158,762.88.  The next step based on the DMZ's understanding, is to multiply that $158,762.88 by the remaining number of months of the contract ending December 2020.  Their next assumption is that if CBB is let go at the end of November 2017, the number of months remaining in the contract is 37.  So they calculated $158.762.88 x 37 months to come up with the $5,874 million buyout total.

However, I believe the actual calculation to come up with the monthly payment is also based on the number of months remaining in the contract.  In the example above, this means the denominator is also 37 rather than 97.  So you then get a monthly payment of $416,216 for the remaining 37 months of the contract period through December 2020, which, of course, comes out to $15.4 million as guaranteed by the contract.  The reason I think this has to be the case is that the numbers don't add up (and are not particularly fair to CBB) if you use the DMZ's logic.  Just look at the final year of the contract.  The buyout is $4 million if CBB were fired in 2020.  So - if UA let him go on January 1st, 2020, if you divide the $4 million buyout by 97, that comes to $41,237 per month.  Multiply that by 12 months remaining in the contract and the total buyout would only be $494,845.36... only a fraction of what the guaranteed buyout says in the contract.  I just don't think there is any way that is correct.  I think the whole numerator / denominator formula is just the method to determine the monthly payout of the guaranteed buyout amount.

That said, the contract does require that if CBB is let go he must "diligently seek and accept other employment," and any money he makes in his new employment offsets what UA would owe him.  So if he gets another job making $200,000 per year, then UA would only pay him $216,000 per month through 2020.  Still a lot, but makes the overall buyout significantly less costly.

No, you are wrong.

hogsanity

Quote from: Sourpuss on October 12, 2017, 01:52:46 pm
(eyes wide open) that would explain a lot, do tell hogsanity...

It had me baffled for a while, could someone actually e as dumb as Pillowhead acted, yet still be able to operate a computer. IT all makes sense now though, Jeff Long is very intelligent, so intelligent that he is able to pose as a borderline moron, yet make up long posts that are brilliant in their own rambling nonsensical way. Only someone with a high intellect could pull that off. Long, under the screen name Pillowhead Jackson posts things that always make hog fans appear to be stupid beyond belief, therefore making himself look more brilliant everytime something being passed around the fan base as the God's honest truth is shown to be totally false ( like the 15mil buyout numer ).

Makes me wonder how many other screen names are actually Jeff Long playing a character. Delta perhaps? Would be funny for a yankee to portray a confederate wannabe who still thinks the civil war is being fought, now woudn't it. Eastex, a calm cool AD portraying an irrational Bobby Petrino worshipper - has its possibilities.  Perhaps even some guy who's screen name appear to promote sane thought in hog land, all the while simply gigging those who fancy themselves as some sort of authority on what goes on at the BAC, even though it always turns out they were clueless.

   
People ask me what I do in winter when there is no baseball.  I will tell you what I do. I stare out the window, and I wait for spring.

"Anything goes wrong, anything at all, your fault, my fault, nobodies fault, I'm going to blow your head off."  John Wayne in BIG JAKE

MB Hog

Quote from: hawgon on October 12, 2017, 02:11:01 pm
No, you are wrong.
So you think his $4 million buyout in the final year is actually only half a million?

hawgon

Quote from: MB Hog on October 12, 2017, 02:13:13 pm
So you think his $4 million buyout in the final year is actually only half a million?

Yes, according to the plain language of the contract.

younghog

Quote from: snoblind on October 12, 2017, 01:10:32 pm
Everybody knew the real number except you, Tusked, and DeltaBoy.  And Wally...

CLASSIC
GO HOGS

Grizzlyfan

Quote from: Pillowhead Jackson on October 12, 2017, 10:34:27 am
Looks like we've all been fooled by that carnival magician Jeff Long. He's been sitting on a $15 million smokescreen for all these years...now it suddenly and mysteriously leaks out that it may not be $15 million. 

This was a smokescreen's smokescreen. This makes the smokescreen of hiring Les Miles look like pulling a quarter out a 3 year old's ear. 

Expect more smokescreens.  None of us know what he's up to. That much is certain and we prove how little we know every day.

Somehow this sly old boy from up north is going to continue to pull rabbits out of his hat and saw folks in half right before our eyes (I'd like to volunteer a few of you to get sawed in half) and we're going to sit here and like it.

The only guy who could mess this up is CBB himself. If he wins six games and gets a bowl game he may mess up Long's trick.

And the last three football coaches were rabbits out of a hat anyway. Expect continued and prodigious use of smokescreens that will make Fayetteville look like one big fun house. Expect Long to hire someone that has never been mentioned here before.
The contract hasn't been hidden in a mayonnaise jar on Funk & Wagnalls porch.  Long didn't leak anything.  It's just taken a while for someone to properly interpret the buyout language.

hawgon

Quote from: MB Hog on October 12, 2017, 02:13:13 pm
So you think his $4 million buyout in the final year is actually only half a million?

But, of course there will never be a last year of the contract.  For recruiting purposes, coaches almost always have at least four years on their contract unless they are about to be fired.  So, under normal circumstances the lowest that buyout would ever be is somewhere between three and four million even if that lowest figure was used to compute it.

 

The OTR

Quote from: hogsanity on October 12, 2017, 02:13:10 pm
It had me baffled for a while, could someone actually e as dumb as Pillowhead acted, yet still be able to operate a computer. IT all makes sense now though, Jeff Long is very intelligent, so intelligent that he is able to pose as a borderline moron, yet make up long posts that are brilliant in their own rambling nonsensical way. Only someone with a high intellect could pull that off. Long, under the screen name Pillowhead Jackson posts things that always make hog fans appear to be stupid beyond belief, therefore making himself look more brilliant everytime something being passed around the fan base as the God's honest truth is shown to be totally false ( like the 15mil buyout numer ).

Makes me wonder how many other screen names are actually Jeff Long playing a character. Delta perhaps? Would be funny for a yankee to portray a confederate wannabe who still thinks the civil war is being fought, now woudn't it. Eastex, a calm cool AD portraying an irrational Bobby Petrino worshipper - has its possibilities.  Perhaps even some guy who's screen name appear to promote sane thought in hog land, all the while simply gigging those who fancy themselves as some sort of authority on what goes on at the BAC, even though it always turns out they were clueless.



First paragraph is feasible. Second paragraph is sheer nonsense.

Hogs-n-Roses


TheJoeyBucketz

Quote from: MB Hog on October 12, 2017, 02:07:15 pm
I think you are correct.  It's very confusing because the contract gives the buyout amount as the Total Guaranty Payment, but then says the payment schedule for the buyout amount is also based on the number of months in the employment term and the number of months remaining in the term.  The way the DMZ calculated, they divided the $15.4 million (prior to of Jan. 1, 2018) by the total number of months of the contract (97) beginning December 4, 2012 and going through December 31, 2020.  This comes to a monthly total of $158,762.88.  The next step based on the DMZ's understanding, is to multiply that $158,762.88 by the remaining number of months of the contract ending December 2020.  Their next assumption is that if CBB is let go at the end of November 2017, the number of months remaining in the contract is 37.  So they calculated $158.762.88 x 37 months to come up with the $5,874 million buyout total.

However, I believe the actual calculation to come up with the monthly payment is also based on the number of months remaining in the contract.  In the example above, this means the denominator is also 37 rather than 97.  So you then get a monthly payment of $416,216 for the remaining 37 months of the contract period through December 2020, which, of course, comes out to $15.4 million as guaranteed by the contract.  The reason I think this has to be the case is that the numbers don't add up (and are not particularly fair to CBB) if you use the DMZ's logic.  Just look at the final year of the contract.  The buyout is $4 million if CBB were fired in 2020.  So - if UA let him go on January 1st, 2020, if you divide the $4 million buyout by 97, that comes to $41,237 per month.  Multiply that by 12 months remaining in the contract and the total buyout would only be $494,845.36... only a fraction of what the guaranteed buyout says in the contract.  I just don't think there is any way that is correct.  I think the whole numerator / denominator formula is just the method to determine the monthly payout of the guaranteed buyout amount.

That said, the contract does require that if CBB is let go he must "diligently seek and accept other employment," and any money he makes in his new employment offsets what UA would owe him.  So if he gets another job making $200,000 per month, then UA would only pay him $216,000 per month through 2020.  Still a lot, but makes the overall buyout significantly less costly.
It clearly tells you how to calculate it. See my post earlier in this thread.

Where you're getting messed up is that you're using his remaining months in the contract as the denominator when the contract says to use his total months. You then multiply the monthly figure by his remaining months to figure the total buyout.

Trust us. Hawgon is an attorney (I'm pretty sure), and I read prospectus's (prospecti?) for a living. Legal language is a B, but it's not black magic.
Dominic Fletcher following his homerun against Texas Tech in Omaha, "I thought they said this park was big?!"

MB Hog

Quote from: hawgon on October 12, 2017, 02:18:20 pm
But, of course there will never be a last year of the contract.  For recruiting purposes, coaches almost always have at least four years on their contract unless they are about to be fired.  So, under normal circumstances the lowest that buyout would ever be is somewhere between three and four million even if that lowest figure was used to compute it.
I definitely don't claim to know for sure.  Just trying to make sense of it.

I would think that a $15M buyout is just that... a $15M buyout, but that's just me.  :)

Vantage 8 dude

Quote from: Pillowhead Jackson on October 12, 2017, 10:34:27 am
Looks like we've all been fooled by that carnival magician Jeff Long. He's been sitting on a $15 million smokescreen for all these years...now it suddenly and mysteriously leaks out that it may not be $15 million. 

This was a smokescreen's smokescreen. This makes the smokescreen of hiring Les Miles look like pulling a quarter out a 3 year old's ear. 

Expect more smokescreens.  None of us know what he's up to. That much is certain and we prove how little we know every day.

Somehow this sly old boy from up north is going to continue to pull rabbits out of his hat and saw folks in half right before our eyes (I'd like to volunteer a few of you to get sawed in half) and we're going to sit here and like it.

The only guy who could mess this up is CBB himself. If he wins six games and gets a bowl game he may mess up Long's trick.

And the last three football coaches were rabbits out of a hat anyway. Expect continued and prodigious use of smokescreens that will make Fayetteville look like one big fun house. Expect Long to hire someone that has never been mentioned here before.
So if I'm understanding this correctly your favorite words of the day are (in order of popularity): "smokescreen" and "rabbit out of the hat". Let us know when you finally progress to the part of the weekly reader that goes something like "See Spot run". "Does Spot see Dick and Jane"?

The OTR

Quote from: Vantage 8 dude on October 12, 2017, 02:58:14 pm
So if I'm understanding this correctly your favorite words of the day are (in order of popularity): "smokescreen" and "rabbit out of the hat". Let us know when you finally progress to the part of the weekly reader that goes something like "See Spot run". "Does Spot see Dick and Jane"?

I too scoffed at the term smokescreen when I first joined hogville. Then I saw first hand how many smokescreens Long used during our coaching searches and realized that this antiquated term is the only way to describe the various deceptive and tricky moves our AD has.

I guess he's more of a wizard than magician.  Rabbit out of a hat is a dummied down term that guys like yourself can comprehend. Obviously not many of you can read a simple employment contract so I am going to start trying to simplify things as much as I can.

Hoggish1

Quote from: Pillowhead Jackson on October 12, 2017, 11:16:20 am
Let me put this a way you boys can understand....pains me to have to spell it out this way but for some of you numskulls it's the only way you will ever understand the high level business dealings of this thing.

CBB is standing there in his windbreaker on a trap door. He just doesn't know it. He's fat and happy.  Long is standing on the side looking at him, hand steady on the lever. Long knows that those hungry crocodiles are just below the trap door and all he has to do is move the lever two inches and CBB's a goner. 

CBB just realized there's a trap door. He just realized that Long just moved the lever a quarter inch yesterday.  The trap door is cracked just a bit and he sees those glowing eyes of crocodiles just below him. He wants to hop off the trap door but he's afraid if he moves the thing will break under his bulk and he'll be gone.  His only hope is Jeff Long having mercy on him.  With every loss this season Long moves the lever another half inch.  At some point CBB may decide enough is enough and ask for another way out. Long may or may not allow him to step off and step away on his own terms. Who knows. Long's eyes are cold blue steel right now. Old stone poker face.

I hope some of you catch on soon. I've watched this buyout obsessed mess around here for two years screaming about Jerry Jones and the Waltons buying out this contract while Jeff Long is sitting there with a full house. 

Sad really that more of you haven't seen this before today. It's funny in some ways too..but mostly just really sad....and really funny.

Well, give yourself a cookie.

Hoggish1

Quote from: hogsanity on October 12, 2017, 02:13:10 pm
It had me baffled for a while, could someone actually e as dumb as Pillowhead acted, yet still be able to operate a computer. IT all makes sense now though, Jeff Long is very intelligent, so intelligent that he is able to pose as a borderline moron, yet make up long posts that are brilliant in their own rambling nonsensical way. Only someone with a high intellect could pull that off. Long, under the screen name Pillowhead Jackson posts things that always make hog fans appear to be stupid beyond belief, therefore making himself look more brilliant everytime something being passed around the fan base as the God's honest truth is shown to be totally false ( like the 15mil buyout numer ).

Makes me wonder how many other screen names are actually Jeff Long playing a character. Delta perhaps? Would be funny for a yankee to portray a confederate wannabe who still thinks the civil war is being fought, now woudn't it. Eastex, a calm cool AD portraying an irrational Bobby Petrino worshipper - has its possibilities.  Perhaps even some guy who's screen name appear to promote sane thought in hog land, all the while simply gigging those who fancy themselves as some sort of authority on what goes on at the BAC, even though it always turns out they were clueless.

   

Excellent.

Feralhog

Quote from: hogsanity on October 12, 2017, 02:13:10 pm
It had me baffled for a while, could someone actually e as dumb as Pillowhead acted, yet still be able to operate a computer. IT all makes sense now though, Jeff Long is very intelligent, so intelligent that he is able to pose as a borderline moron, yet make up long posts that are brilliant in their own rambling nonsensical way. Only someone with a high intellect could pull that off. Long, under the screen name Pillowhead Jackson posts things that always make hog fans appear to be stupid beyond belief, therefore making himself look more brilliant everytime something being passed around the fan base as the God's honest truth is shown to be totally false ( like the 15mil buyout numer ).

Makes me wonder how many other screen names are actually Jeff Long playing a character. Delta perhaps? Would be funny for a yankee to portray a confederate wannabe who still thinks the civil war is being fought, now woudn't it. Eastex, a calm cool AD portraying an irrational Bobby Petrino worshipper - has its possibilities.  Perhaps even some guy who's screen name appear to promote sane thought in hog land, all the while simply gigging those who fancy themselves as some sort of authority on what goes on at the BAC, even though it always turns out they were clueless.

   

You've given us a lot to think about.  Maybe the fulmigating Royal heads could confirm your suspesions
Seer, Sage, Soothsayer and former coach finder for the Tejas Longhorns.......Feralhog the Magnificent

jgphillips3

Look, the "common knowledge" of the $15 million buyout kept us from open revolt.  Now that the PTB are starting to slowly break against Long, you let the ADG publish this story to say "see...Long did negotiate a smart contract" and by the way we can jettison the coach if we have to.  I know two things now: 1) I don't ever want to play cards with Long & 2) I hope the BOT is heavily involved in the new coach selection so it is not solely Jeff's decision.

Feralhog

Quote from: jgphillips3 on October 12, 2017, 05:00:04 pm
Look, the "common knowledge" of the $15 million buyout kept us from open revolt.  Now that the PTB are starting to slowly break against Long, you let the ADG publish this story to say "see...Long did negotiate a smart contract" and by the way we can jettison the coach if we have to.  I know two things now: 1) I don't ever want to play cards with Long & 2) I hope the BOT is heavily involved in the new coach selection so it is not solely Jeff's decision.

Let's pray and pretend for a second that you're right.  I can't keep from going back to his track record.  The only program that appears to be gliding on a nice looking plane is the women's golf team.
Seer, Sage, Soothsayer and former coach finder for the Tejas Longhorns.......Feralhog the Magnificent

Martygit

OK boys - I did it for others in another thread so I guess I'll do it for you here - the contract says what it says:

I'm a lawyer and have stayed at a Holiday Inn Express - I've drafted, reviewed, revised and litigated contracts - this seems really simple to me - the $15.4 number is a number that the University would have owed him if they had fired him on day one or any time during that month - after that, up until 1/1/18 you take the $15.4, divide it by the number of months of the contract (which is 97 and remains static throughout the term of the contract) - that gives you a monthly number which you then multiply by the number of months remaining on the term of the contract.  So you divide the $15.4 by 97 which reveals a monthly figure of $158,762+some change - you then multiply that number by the number of months left in the term of the contract which, as I understand it, terminates on 12/31/20 - including all of October, that means 39 months as of today - so, if you fire him today, $158,762 x 39 = $6.1-6.2. If you wait until after the season is over and fire him during December but before 1/1/18 you owe him $158,762 x 36 (you pro-rate the month of December based on what day you fire him) which reveals a buyout of about $5.7.

If you wait until 1/1/18 the numerator (the $15.4 figure) goes down to $11.7 according to the chart I saw.  So instead of dividing $15.4 by the 97 months in the term of the contract, you would divide $11.7 by that 97 months to give you a monthly buyout figure.  $11.7 divided by 97 = $120,618.  Then you multiply that by the number of months remaining in the term of the contract which, as of 1/1/18 is 36 so, $120,618 x 36 = $4.342+.

And, the University gets to pay that off monthly with some offsets in the event he finds other work.
RIP OTR, REV

Cinco de Hogo

I hope this thread is meant to be high comedy.  I'm fine with the ideal of grasping for straws while over said trapdoor.  What trapdoor you say...why the one your standing on that you didn't see because of the smokescreen.

Ex-Trumpet

Quote from: Pillowhead Jackson on October 12, 2017, 01:19:44 pm
Here's what I visualize happening at the long household tonight....Jeff sitting there in his slacks, tie loosened, warm sweater on...fireplace with a small fire crackling softly in the background. Laptop hooked up to the printer at his desk...reading glasses on the end of his nose...glass of grey goose on ice sitting neatly on a coaster exactly in the middle of the coaster....paper towel under the coaster just in case.

He goes through MMQB methodically. He's down to the D's and opens the file cabinet and puts all the members he has a dossier on onto his desk.  Old manilla files, much worn, some thick as war and peace, some more like a cheap paperback from the dollar store. 

The D's.  Oh yes, the D's. In Long's mind the D might as well stand for Devil. Some of hogville's most notorious members are D's.  Darrell Royal's head...nice thick file with mostly nonsense but he's on the list and every one of his posts go in a file....Deepshoat....Dr. Starcs....Dwight_K_Shrute...Dluxhog...and the thickest file of all...one that makes war and peace look like a comic book?  Delta....yes poor delta. Long dreads going through the d's.  He knows Delta averages 179 posts per day, mostly one or two word posts.  But he prints them all off...stuffs them into the thick file...and trudges ahead to the E's...easttexashog...erie...ex-trumpet.

It's painstaking work. Long believes in keeping everything on paper rather than snapping screen shots and saving them electronically.  If he ever needs to he can just set fire to the files and they're gone.  Not a bad way to do things.

Please, Delta, for your own sake be careful of what else you write here from this point forward.  Jeff Long is getting more powerful by the minute and you keep popping off about him. I'm trying to paint this picture for you. I hope you will take heed.

Yes, I imagine the glass is exactly in the middle of the coaster!!
Do dyslexic, agnostic insomniacs lie awake at night wondering if there really is a dog?

Vantage 8 dude

Quote from: Pillowhead Jackson on October 12, 2017, 03:21:40 pm
I too scoffed at the term smokescreen when I first joined hogville. Then I saw first hand how many smokescreens Long used during our coaching searches and realized that this antiquated term is the only way to describe the various deceptive and tricky moves our AD has.

I guess he's more of a wizard than magician.  Rabbit out of a hat is a dummied down term that guys like yourself can comprehend. Obviously not many of you can read a simple employment contract so I am going to start trying to simplify things as much as I can.
Hey dude, don't lecture me on not being able to comprehend a simple contract. First of all, I haven't read it. Don't care to. It's enough that we have clowns like you interpreting it for all the rest of the world. And as far as simplifying things, how about instead of attempting to become the next Super Hero's comic book author you learn how to correctly predict the outcome of ballgames? After all with all your weather, time, temp. and date mumbo jumbo that ought to keep you busy for quite some time. And you can start by predicting the score of last night's Yankees/Indians ADL game.

Martygit

Quote from: Ex-Trumpet on October 12, 2017, 06:13:15 pm
Yes, I imagine the glass is exactly in the middle of the coaster!!

Hey!!!! Go anal or go home!!!
RIP OTR, REV

Ex-Trumpet

Do dyslexic, agnostic insomniacs lie awake at night wondering if there really is a dog?


a0ashle

Quote from: golf2day on October 12, 2017, 12:30:40 pm
Cmon, man. Think about it.

Like the guy or not, it's the AD's job to publicly support the coach until it's tme for a new coach. How in gods green earth could JL come out and correct our retarded media (sorry, but not reading the contract and misreporting this for years is pretty bad) without looking like he's not 100% behind CBB?

"Hey everybody, don't worry, the buyout is nowhere near that high. I can still fire him at a reasonable cost if he doesn't win" doesn't exactly instill confidence in the program.

If anything, the fact that Long let people roast him over that contract without correcting it makes me trust him more. The guy took the heat over something he didn't do to keep confidence in the program as high as possible.

But this doesn't lay the groundwork for firing long, therefore it must be false \s

Ex-Trumpet

Do dyslexic, agnostic insomniacs lie awake at night wondering if there really is a dog?

Cinco de Hogo

Quote from: a0ashle on October 12, 2017, 06:22:16 pm
But this doesn't lay the groundwork for firing long, therefore it must be false \s

Grasping at straws for your man,  it's only the $15 mil buyout for some of the latest converts.  For the rest of us it goes back a ways.

Martygit

Quote from: a0ashle on October 12, 2017, 06:22:16 pm
But this doesn't lay the groundwork for firing long, therefore it must be false \s

You know what?, when I was listening to the herd and thought the buyout was $15.4 like was being bandied about, I was in favor of getting rid of Long too - however, when I read the contract and actually knew what was going on, I understood that although BB was Long's boy, and Long thought that BB would be a success here, he put the University first and negotiated a contract that lets us get away from BB without a buyout that might set a precedent for future coaches that would hurt the University.  I'm actually impressed with the contract that Long negotiated and when you look at the other accomplishments that Long has been involved in (that is, other sports and facilities) I think Long has been good for the University - yeah, I know that's not the popular opinion around here, but that's what I'm thinking
RIP OTR, REV

PonderinHog


Dark Helmet Hog

I find it entertaining that no one has considered that Long may not have comprehended the wording of the contract and may have called the University attorneys this morning asking WTH? Perhaps the real magician is the attorney that drew up the contract. Imagine his amusement through all his.

TheJoeyBucketz

Quote from: Dark Helmet Hog on October 12, 2017, 07:16:29 pm
I find it entertaining that no one has considered that Long may not have comprehended the wording of the contract and may have called the University attorneys this morning asking WTH? Perhaps the real magician is the attorney that drew up the contract. Imagine his amusement through all his.
I'm sure that's the case. Good job, Sherlock.
Dominic Fletcher following his homerun against Texas Tech in Omaha, "I thought they said this park was big?!"

trippigs

Don't think for a minute that Jeff Long doesn't know the detailed financial terms of Coach's contract. He hasn't fooled anyone....he has just been quiet. The man is a financial wizard.