From the Bench - The Year that Was Not for Predicting College Football Games

[Robert Shields]

The Year that Was Not for Predicting College Football Games

Robert Shields

The Arkansas Razorbacks 6-6 finish was probably not a huge surprise as many had them picked to finish with that record including this scribe. The surprise for me came in how they got to 6-6.

I did not see this team reaching the six-win bowl eligibility plateau through the route of beating LSU and Ole Miss. The victory over LSU was one of the finer Razorback wins of this decade to snap that 17-game SEC losing streak. The fans stormed the field for only the third time in history at Fayetteville.

I expected the 6-6 record to have some very ugly losses in the mix. Although one could argue the Auburn and Georgia games might fit that category, I do not. In both games, the Razorbacks were up for the challenge and fought hard. After spotting Georgia 38 points, the Hogs rallied, and that simply would not have occurred in the previous two seasons. There was not a 52-0 beat down this year.

At the beginning of the season, I made light about Bo Mattingly on his radio show mentioning Martrell Spaight doing yoga as though it was going to help his play. Spaight finished the season as the SEC's leading tackler. He was a monster on the field, so if it was due to yoga, others on the team need to consider it.

Also at the beginning of the season, I posed the question as many did as to which area of the team would see the most improvement -- quarterback play or the defense. I guessed it would be the defense since it was wretched the last two seasons. But I have to admit that I never anticipated the defense improving as much as it did. The defense was the reason the team won six games.

I guaranteed a victory over LSU in my column the week before the game, but it was one of the few games that I had a feeling for this season.

If imitation is a the highest form of flattery, this is where my column takes a page out of the script of Razorback legendary writer Harry King, who writes a column once a year before the season starts about the college pick 'em pool that we play in.

The name of it is called Poolsville and roughly 150 participate in the game each year with people ranging from sports writers, previous Heisman voters, a seminarian, successful lawyers, my wife, and even someone undeserving as me.

The winner is awarded the prestigious Ramon Escobar Trophy and many would tell you they would easily trade the large monetary reward that comes with winning if they could just get the trophy. The award is named after a bruising running back who played for Holy Souls in the brutal Central Arkansas Parochial League.

Poolsville quirkily has crowned its own college football national championship named "Slabby" for more than a decade.  It's a 75-pound stone tablet that is offered to the winning school, which can keep Slabby for one year if it completes what is referred to as the Frank Broyles Feat of Strength.

The athletic director of the winning school has to carry Slabby 10 feet to its resting spot. Though no AD to this date as accepted the challenge, I have no doubt Frank Broyles even to this day would easily complete the task.

Three times I was on the wrong side of the national championship game that kept me from winning it all. In the 2005 season, I had USC over Texas.  I think my screaming "NO!" still reverberates around the universe when Vince Young danced into the end zone to beat the Trojans.

In the 2012, I had Notre Dame. I was spared the close game as Alabama destroyed the Irish. Last season, I picked Auburn like everyone in the pool. But had I picked Florida State, I would have carried home my own trophy. It's the reason many refer to the game as "Cruelsville."

This year I had one of my best starts ever in the game, but unfortunately the game is not a sprint – it's definitely a marathon. Slowly, the season slipped away from me as close game after close game I was on the wrong side of the outcome.

I watched Georgia lose to South Carolina by a chain link. Many learned from that game that the football does not have to touch the stick, but just clear the last link. The Bulldogs did not. I watched Clemson fumble its game away against Florida State and send the game into overtime (bonus points, ouch!).

I witnessed a ref call a pick foul on Notre Dame against Florida State and have never seen that foul called again the rest of the season. I witnessed a replay official wipe out a game-winning touchdown by Laquon Treadwell of Ole Miss against Auburn and decide it was a fumble.

A couple of weeks later, I watched a replay official reverse an Alabama fumble at the goal line against Mississippi State and make it a touchdown that ended up being the difference in the game. And I don't even need to mention the replay official reversals in the Razorback game against Missouri.

In every case and many other close games, I was on the wrong side. I finished the regular season with a dismal record.

Alas, year after year, I am reminded of my failure in Poolsville as a Ramon Escobar Trophy wearing a pink tulle skirt is prominently displayed on my mantle. And that trophy does not belong to me. It belongs to my wife, a past champion of Poolsville, who will never let me forget it.



Help me in the pool by sending your bowl pick suggestions to fromthebench@yahoo.com.

[Hollywood_HOGan45]

 :razorback:

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[The_Iceman]

[The_Iceman]

Oh, and.....

[Dr. Starcs]

Well, I guess you're not any better at writing articles or being a man of your word (i.e. Lubbock article) than picking games.

[wupigsuey]

One of your better writings

[PorkRinds]

Scribe is not an applicable adjective in this case.

[BadHog]

Scribe is not an applicable adjective in this case.

[OneTuskOverTheLine™]

you've finally worn me down... I can't make anymore fun of you...

[Smokehouse]

Short of a huge metaphor, that title has got to be the most ridiculous way to say "An Unpredictable Season" you could have gone with.

[hogwild6700]

I would be curious to know how many of you who come up with these creative ways of saying "Didn't Read" actually DID in fact read it.

[Hogfaniam]

I would be curious to know how many of you who come up with these creative ways of saying "Didn't Read" actually DID in fact read it.

I open it for the "Didn't read, haha"'s

[The_Iceman]

I would be curious to know how many of you who come up with these creative ways of saying "Didn't Read" actually DID in fact read it.

Read a Robert Shields article once. It was Horrible. Won't ever again.

[presidenthog]

Has anyone ever considered that he calls it from the bench because his writing is clearly not starter quality? And so he is nothing more than a bench warmer in the column world?

[ricepig]

you've finally worn me down... I can't make anymore fun of you...

Sure you can, gather some strength, go to V and R and re-read some of the terribly written ones, you'll come around........

[The_Iceman]

Sure you can, gather some strength, go to V and R and re-read some of the terribly written ones, you'll come around........

You would actually ask someone to read a Robert Shields post? Isn't our society dumb enough already?

[ricepig]

You would actually ask someone to read a Robert Shields post? Isn't our society dumb enough already?

Only to point out the inconsistencies, mistakes, and just plain gosh awful writing.

[Inhogswetrust]

Has anyone ever considered that he calls it from the bench because his writing is clearly not starter quality? And so he is nothing more than a bench warmer in the column world?

He ought to call it from the Porta Potty...........................or even more appropriate "from the girls bathroom" (based on his so called best selling book that he constantly has to advertise at the bottom of his posts)

[presidenthog]

He ought to call it from the Porta Potty...........................or even more appropriate "from the girls bathroom" (based on his so called best selling book that he constantly has to advertise at the bottom of his posts)

What is this book you speak of? He has a book?

[Psychohog]

I open it for the "Didn't read, haha"'s

I'm not the only one!

[Inhogswetrust]

What is this book you speak of? He has a book?

Did you say something about a book............sorry I'm distracted by your avatar!

[Hog1966]

I open it for the "Didn't read, haha"'s

Here here! 

[OneTuskOverTheLine™]

Has anyone ever considered that he calls it from the bench because his writing is clearly not starter quality? And so he is nothing more than a bench warmer in the column world?

That's like calling the hot dog vendor a "back-up" for the secondary...

THANKS RICEPIG...

[Calling All Hogs]

What is this book you speak of? He has a book?

His book SCARLET FEVER: A RAZORBACK HOUSE DIVIDED is on Amazon. It has 5 customer reviews with an average rating of one star. Folks don't seem to take kindly to reading RS after paying to do so. 
http://www.amazon.com/SCARLET-FEVER-RAZORBACK-HOUSE-DIVIDED/dp/0557295726/ref=la_B0040YW1IG_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1418693928&sr=1-2

[DeltaBoy]

It was a great season by the D they really grew up.

[Jim]

I open it for the "Didn't read, haha"'s

This.

[The_Iceman]

Clicked on thread just to give Robert another -1

[HogFanatic]

I'm just glad to see that here it is almost Wednesday and this nonsense is still only about halfway through the first page.

I have never understood why people want to click on these threads just to point out the obvious fact that Robert Shields can't write worth a damn. I mean Jesus, all you gotta do is read that nonsensical thread title to see that the content is going to blow goats.

If people just wouldn't pay the dude any attention, they wouldn't have to worry about him posting here anymore. It is only promoted at all, or allowed at all, because it generates interest - whether that be positive OR negative. The guy clearly doesn't come here to discuss anything. He data-mines this place, and most likely other forums, and then regurgitates what he reads. Several of us do the same thing, but we don't try and pass it off as actual journalism. What's worse is the guy obviously has a bloated ego. Love the name dropping in this piece, Robert.

-1

[Smokehouse]

His book SCARLET FEVER: A RAZORBACK HOUSE DIVIDED is on Amazon. It has 5 customer reviews with an average rating of one star. Folks don't seem to take kindly to reading RS after paying to do so. 
http://www.amazon.com/SCARLET-FEVER-RAZORBACK-HOUSE-DIVIDED/dp/0557295726/ref=la_B0040YW1IG_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1418693928&sr=1-2

The best part is that he not only responded to the negative reviews, he responded with a cut-and-paste comment where he just switched the names out. Pro-tip: authors responded to negative reviews never results in the author looking better or people coming away with a better feeling about the book.

Also, I wasn't aware that posting on blogspot pages and Hogville made one a syndicated columnist. I better add that to my resume!

[Rey Pygsterio]

I have not read "Scarlet Fever," but I did read "Daphne and the Mysterious Girls Secret Bathroom Society." It is actually pretty good.

Some of you would be surprised to discover that Shields is not bad at fiction, though some would probably say that's what his columns are.

"Daphne" has some decent reviews on Goodreads.

[Robert Shields]

The best part is that he not only responded to the negative reviews, he responded with a cut-and-paste comment where he just switched the names out. Pro-tip: authors responded to negative reviews never results in the author looking better or people coming away with a better feeling about the book.

Also, I wasn't aware that posting on blogspot pages and Hogville made one a syndicated columnist. I better add that to my resume!

I had to go back and read all the comments.  I will never know, but I think the negative comments actually helped me sell more books as it exposed it as a highly charged topic.  The book ended up reaching #2 in Amazon's best seller rank for its category.  I agree that in hindsight I should not have commented back to two of the responses although I don't have a problem with what I wrote to them.  I would still today have responded to B. Campbell who had not read the book.  I wrote another book titled Razorback Wrecks about the Bobby Petrino years, but never published it. But, I might.

As for being syndicated, I have been syndicated in papers around Arkansas for over 17 years.

[The_Iceman]

I had to go back and read all the comments.  I will never know, but I think the negative comments actually helped me sell more books as it exposed it as a highly charged topic.  The book ended up reaching #2 in Amazon's best seller rank for its category.  I agree that in hindsight I should not have commented back to two of the responses although I don't have a problem with what I wrote to them.  I would still today have responded to B. Campbell who had not read the book.  I wrote another book titled Razorback Wrecks about the Bobby Petrino years, but never published it. But, I might.

As for being syndicated, I have been syndicated in papers around Arkansas for over 17 years.

[Smokehouse]

As for being syndicated, I have been syndicated in papers around Arkansas for over 17 years.

My apologies, then, I've never encountered an article of yours off of blogpost or Hogville.

[Inhogswetrust]

I had to go back and read all the comments.  I will never know, but I think the negative comments actually helped me sell more books as it exposed it as a highly charged topic.  The book ended up reaching #2 in Amazon's best seller rank for its category.  I agree that in hindsight I should not have commented back to two of the responses although I don't have a problem with what I wrote to them.  I would still today have responded to B. Campbell who had not read the book.  I wrote another book titled Razorback Wrecks about the Bobby Petrino years, but never published it. But, I might.

As for being syndicated, I have been syndicated in papers around Arkansas for over 17 years.

Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #5,488,113 in Books


Based on this ranking. What obscure, out in outer space way, mind numbing, nobody cares about "category" is this a best seller in...................... Let me guess public toilet reading material!

[jmb1973]

Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #5,488,113 in Books


Based on this ranking. What obscure, out in outer space way, mind numbing, nobody cares about "category" is this a best seller in…………………. Let me guess public toilet reading material!

The category was "Books we would like to use as kindling to set the author on fire"  Pretty competitive category.

[Inhogswetrust]

My apologies, then, I've never encountered an article of yours off of blogpost or Hogville.

That's because the circulation of the papers he is syndicated in can be counted on a combination of your fingers and toes........................

[intelligence]

It always falls apart midway through the first sentence 

[LSUFan]

What if C A T, really spelled dog?

[HogFanatic]

What if C A T, really spelled dog?

Then you wouldn't be able to predict that dog didn't spell cat?

[intelligence]

I mean Jesus, all you gotta do is read that nonsensical thread title to see that the content is going to blow goats.

I busted up laughing at this classic

[Rey Pygsterio]

Give the gift of Shields this Christmas by putting one of his books in the stocking of a loved one Christmas morning.

[Nipsey Mussle]

Give the gift of Shields this Christmas by putting one of his books in the stocking of a loved one Christmas morning.

I asked, they said they'd prefer coal.

[Ragnar Hogbrok]

Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #5,488,113 in Books


Based on this ranking. What obscure, out in outer space way, mind numbing, nobody cares about "category" is this a best seller in...................... Let me guess public toilet reading material!

No. Public toilet wiping material category.

[The_Iceman]

Give the gift of Shields this Christmas by putting one of his books in the stocking of a loved one Christmas morning.

Would make a great Gag Gift!

[razorbackkid]

I read every word Robert.  It was fun.  I like words because they look funny.

[Inhogswetrust]

No. Public toilet wiping material category.

True but in my family it was the same thing. When I was a young kid and had to use my Grandparents old home place with the outhouse you would read it before wiping with it.